Monday- lundi, nos entretiens en français

Today, or at least this morning, was all about the French interviews they had been preparing for the last couple of weeks. It was time to share with the class, or at least I thought it was. The first part of the morning, with my class, went better than I expected or imagined it would. Students don't realize that they know a lot more than they realize when it comes to language, so when they actually challenge themselves and present, they start to show themselves what they can do. It is exciting learning, and how the morning began.

Starting with groups of students who volunteered to go first, and were actually ready, helped facilitate the smooth success of the morning. Our meditation, with a focus on confidence and a willingness to put in an effort and do their best, also helped support the experience. Student B was tired, and Student A arrived late today, so the classroom was quiet from the start. There was also an added feeling of relief when I told them they would have a few minutes to practice after we meditated but before the presentations began.

So once I started the music, the longest 6 minute and 47 second track, and turned off the lights, everyone relaxed into the silence. I went through the prompts and the breath count, and into the focused breathing, bringing attention to the nerves they might have as they prepare to present their interviews in French, and their ability to note their presence and continue past them, by inhaling their confidence and exhaling their worries, fears and doubts. While visualizing their presentation, and the questions and answers with their partners, I encouraged them to inhale their willingness to try, to speak to the best of their ability, and exhale their need to worry about how they sound or wanting to pronounce everything perfectly.

Then we moved into the silence, and I found a chair on the corner near the computer, opposite from where I usually sit. I chose the seat because there was no chair in my usual spot, and today when I sat between two girls, they were undisturbed by my presence. I noted how comfortable just about everybody has become in the silence, especially on a quiet morning like today. I closed my eyes and breathed, happy and grateful, and as usual the minutes passed quickly. As the track ended and silence filled the room, it was more tempting than ever to keep the quiet for longer, but with presentations ahead and work to be done,  an extra breath or two would have to suffice. I ended the meditation, and after a little time to practice, about half of the class presented their interviews, their 9 everyday questions, and it was clear they had practiced and were well prepared. It was quite impressive.

Which was partly why, when my switch class came to me in fourth period after gym for the same presentations, I was caught off guard by their lack of preparedness. We had put together the interview questions as a class from a grid of questions we use for conversations, and I had provided a framework to help them build their answers, together with the criteria for the interview. While they present, they also need to provide a written version of the interview that can be seen while they are presenting, either on paper or the computer, otherwise it is too challenging to understand what they are trying to say and support proper pronunciation. It was an essential part of the criteria, and I had clearly demonstrated options to the class for the interview, or so I thought.

As we started the class, before we meditated, I mentioned the assessment and reflection for the interview, and when no one took out any interview pages, I began to get suspicious. I asked who had a written version to share and not one person did. I was a little flabbergasted, and perhaps years ago I might have been angry, but today I realized clearly something had been missed.

I showed them some of the work my class had handed earlier that morning, and told them I wasn't sure how it had happened that they didn't know they needed a written version to share, when everyone in my class had, and also pointed out where it was outlined in the criteria. Then I told them it didn't matter how it had happened and we would move forward. I gave them the classes scheduled for presentations today to complete the written version, and told them we would begin the presentations tomorrow.  I also told them that I hoped they would learn to read the instructions, but there is no point worrying about what is done- we just keep learning and moving, and it was on that note that we meditated.

Once again a fourth period meditation meant a track that was under 6 minutes, and as we had already spent some time talking, we got straight to it. As earlier in the morning, I moved through the prompts and the breath count, but the focused breath preparing for the interview presentation would wait until tomorrow. Today I encouraged them to inhale what they need to get the interview down on paper, and exhale the distraction and blocks.

We moved into the silence and everyone settled, except Student 1. He still seems unable to stop moving and today, shortly after we began, he stated shaking his head from side to side, looking one way and then the other, but nowhere in particular, without stopping. At one point during the breath count, I went over to him and gently put my hands on his shoulders, trying to encourage him to relax. But as soon as I did, he starting moving his hand and shaking his pencil, so I figured I should just let him be, and I did.

As we moved into the silence, and I sat down to join, Student A was still moving his head back and forth. I closed my eyes, took a couple of breaths, opened them again and he still hadn't stopped. I watched him for a few more breaths, equally out of concern and fascination, and at some point he noticed me watching and looked at me. We smiled at each other, and then he put his head down, where it stayed for the rest of the meditation. I don't know if it was that smile, and if it was, why was it different than the encouragement I had offered earlier, but I was happy he could rest, even if it was just for a moment.

In the end, it wasn't much more, as the track ended a few breaths later, but it was a peaceful moment and another nice start to the end of the morning. As soon as it ended, everyone got to work and while they did, I marvelled again at the fact that not one person had done a written version, even the strongest, hardest working students, who always get everything done. After my remarks, one of the girls finally confessed they had thought the written part was optional, which was the consensus around the class, to which I responded, "No such luck," and they got back to work.

I am looking forward to their presentations tomorrow.....with only 3 more get-ups to go!

Some Fridays Once Just Isn't Enough

The last Friday of the 2016 school year, and I can't quite capture the level of craziness that escalates over the course of the day among middle school students in words, and even if I could, unless one has experienced it, it is hard to believe. Students who begin the morning fairly calm and rational get wound up over the day with excitement and the buzz of energy. Student A's constant movement, and his in-your-face poking and prodding, also impact the energy level and the volume in the classroom too.

The morning started calmly enough, pretty peacefully actually. Just about everyone was back and with only 1st period with my class, I chose a short 5 and a half minute track. Student A had arrived with a lot of energy, but as the morning began we managed to sit down and plan out the day, which included working on some of the projects in the Minecraft Crafts book we had found at the library the day before. He was pretty happy about that and working on the game design project in Exploratory and so I convinced him he could stay for the first class of LA, in which we would be discussing "Life in the Warsaw Ghetto" after we meditated.

He agreed, and if I knew why we could make real progress, but I wasn't and am still not complaining, and after a couple of final pokes at the person behind him, he put his head down and kept it there. Student B needed a reminder about the choices he makes and his ability to control himself, after emitting a few random noises as I turned out the lights. He calmed and was quiet, and so was everybody else, as I started our meditation on the final Friday of 2016.

I went through the usual prompts and breath count, and then moved into the focused breath, encouraging them to inhale what they need and exhale what they don't to bring a successful end to the last full week of 2016. I kept my words brief as it was a short track and I wanted to maximize the quiet breathing. I was glad I did, because the room was still and silent. The 2 minutes passed quickly and I breathed in my gratitude for the peaceful start, and for Friday. the last Friday of 2016.

The class which followed, and the introduction to Life in the Ghetto, went quickly, as did the rest of the morning. My switch class came for the same LA class as earlier in the last period of the morning, after gym, and their energy, and the general level of craziness was already starting to rise. I didn't waste any time getting into the meditation, and again with the short period I chose the short track.

It took a moment, and a gentle reminder, to help them settle, but everybody calmed pretty quickly, except Student A. Student B once again left the room just as we were starting, reminding me that I had forgotten to talk to him about it, a pretty common occurrence in my teaching life. I noted that I would try to remember, but until I did, I would have to keep letting it go. So I started as he left the room, turning off the lights behind him.

As I began the usual prompts, Student 1 decided to take them to heart, but rather than relaxing each part of his body, he tensed it. When I approached him, encouraging him to relax, he tensed even more and played innocent, as if he had no idea what I meant. I told him to soften his shoulders and whatever he did, to be quiet. I walked away, letting him be, and went on with the breath count.

He relaxed a little and settled into the quiet as did everyone else. I moved to the focused breath, pretty much as I had first thing in the morning, and then sat down in my spot to join in the silence. Student 2 had returned without calling any attention, taking his sit beside the other boy who likes to read and fidget, who had come back to that spot with the return of another student. The boy didn't bother Student 2, who had closed his eyes and was breathing, but caught the attention of Student 1, who noticed me looking at the boy playing with his pencil.

Student 1 started sshing the boy, putting his finger to his lips, and then did the same to his tablemate, by whom he continues to be bothered, though the other boy doesn't really do anything, or at least anything I have noticed. I gave Student 1 a look, but he continued his attempts to direct the other boys, and so I looked at him, and quietly but firmed said his name, and "Stop It," which he finally did.

I try to avoid directing behaviour aloud as much as possible, but I was glad I did on Friday. Though my voice momentarily distracted some students, who lifted their heads or opened their eyes, they remained undisturbed, and Student 1 finally put his head down, letting everyone else enjoy the last minutes of the meditation as well. It was annoying, but ended nicely, so overall, a good start to the last class of the morning.

After lunch, I continued my learning with my switch class and my class went to Mr. Y for Science. They are learning about Energy and were doing some sort of experiment that involved baggies of water at various temperatures, including ice. Everyone was engaged in the work, and as our classrooms are next door to each other, I could see the general action and hear the volume at times.

As their work wrapped up, and my switch class was working on their tasks, Student A made his way into my classroom. He had done some of the experimental work, but was reaching his limit and starting to disturb everyone. We managed to connect, and he conveyed his desire to explore his MInecraft craft. Luckily, the space was available, and the awesome teacher in charge of the classroom and equipment he needed is exceptionally accommodating and understanding, and so she allowed him to get to work, which he was happy to do.

It is really quite amazing because once he began he was engaged for the rest of the afternoon, a good 90 minutes. He was working with beads and patterns and the work was intricate, but he was focused and undisturbed by others in the room. He just wanted to do the project. Equally interesting is the project he chose from the Minecraft Crafts had nothing to do with the swords, weapons or even the treasure chest, but instead he chose the flowers in pots. So it was patterns of flowers that engrossed all of his energy and attention. In the end, Student A is just a kind, little boy who still wants to create flowers. He is quite a kid.

I was happy he was engaged and taken care of, as when everyone else came back after break it was clear they needed my attention as well. The Science experiment caused quite the stir, and they were pumped and tired. I had already decided we would meditate again, and as we began and it took a few moments for everyone to get seated and settled, it was clear to me everyone needed it. More out of curiosity, than planning to change my mind, I half stated, half questioned, "We are going to meditate again now, okay?"

Most responded with a "yes" that reflected their relief to have a few moments to relax and breath as we went into the last hour of the day. Student B was among those who weren't thrilled about the second meditation, and displayed his disinterest with a few more random noises. I asked him if he needed to take a break, or if he would be able to control himself, and he indicated he prefered to stay and could control his behaviour. His buddy across the room thought that was funny, but quieted after I gave him a look, as did Student B, though he was a little sulky.

It was clear everyone else was happy to have a few minutes to rest, because they all put their heads down within moments. I went through the prompts, emphasizing that we still connect with Treaty 1 Territory land and note the connection each time, then the breath count, and finally the focused breath, suggesting they inhale calm and exhale their excess energy, as we came into the last hour of the day. They had work to do and the time in which to accomplish it, so I encouraged them to visualize what they needed to do and how they intended to do it with each inhale, and exhale the fear and distraction that blocks them from getting it done.

We moved into the silence and though Student B wasn't completely silent, he was only mildly annoying and did not succeed in distracting his friends or calling too much attention. I managed to close my eyes and take a few breaths with my students, giving thanks that Student A was taken care of and we all had a few minutes to breath.

The minutes went quickly, and though it was tempting to maintain the silence and let them rest, I ended the meditation and everyone got to work. Considering the mood of the day, and that it was the last hour of the last Friday of the year, it was pretty calm and productive, and it too flew by.

Often in middle school, the morning has nothing to do with the afternoon and sometimes it is worth it to take the extra six minutes to breathe once more. I sure as glad we did on Friday.

And now the real countdown begins....the final week, and it's a short one...only 4 more get-ups to go

Hope everyone has a peaceful and productive Monday!

Thursday at the Millennium Library

Our field trip was cancelled last week because of the snow, but I was lucky to get a bus for today and so we were off to the library. It was freezing outside, but sunny and warm under the big windows and our students had a fun and productive day, well most of them anyway- everyone managed to accomplish the fun part, and not get themselves in any trouble or be too annoying, and the day was happily uneventful.

Before we left, following our now regular routine, after announcements we all came together in Mr. Y's room. We had to spend an extra few minutes talking about safety and awareness at the library, as there had been an incident the other day when a colleague was there with her students, and they had to alert security who called the police. We talked about staying with their friends, knowing where we, their  teachers, were, and remembering they are familiar with the library staff and even the security guards, who are there if we need them.

Then we spoke of the need to balance our awareness of the dangers in the world and our surroundings with our ability to live, and enjoy our lives in the world and all it has to offer, that we need to pay attention to ourselves and our surroundings so that we don't let fear control us or the things we do, and that I expected we would enjoy our learning at the library again today as we have before, which thankfully is exactly what we did.

It was on that note that we began the meditation. Student A had been a little jumpy in the morning, but had settled as we came together, and even though he was sitting next to his buddy from the other room, put his head down when we began the meditation, as did his friend and just about everyone else. Student B and Student 2 were in different corners, both a little tired and quiet. Student 1 was away again, as were a few other, but everyone who was there was happy to be there, and to be going to the library. Everyone settled very quickly and the room was calm and quiet from beginning to end.

We started the meditations with the usual prompts and breath count and I was able to focus on my words, without having to manage any behaviour or hover in any one spot. I moved to the focused breath and guided them to visualize the library, to imagine the plan they had laid out for the day, and visualize the spot they would sit, whether on the first floor with us, somewhere on the carousels along the stairs, or up on the fourth floor, and the work they would accomplish. I encouraged them to set their intentions for the day, the goals they hoped to accomplish, and envision them with each breath, inhaling their strength and confidence to follow through, and exhaling the fear that gets in their way.

We moved into the silence and it was lovely to find an available chair, and not have to worry about standing near one or two students, or anyone bothering anyone else. I closed my eyes and breathed, enjoying the silence, feeling grateful for it, the day ahead, and the fact that my headache was gone.

As the track ended, there was no time to dawdle as we were heading out for the day. But before we got going, Mr.Y, who had been sitting at the front of the class, and rarely comments on meditations, took a moment to point out the growth he has observed over the last three months. He noted that when we first began, he used to look up and notice students fidgeting or calling attention, but now he hardly sees that anymore, He told them he sees their silence and their growing maturity.

It was nice that his comments echoed what I have noticed and told them as well, and even better that their choices throughout the day reflected the intentions they set for themselves. Student B was focused all day long, was productive and felt very accomplished, and even though there were a few tentative moments, Student A managed to pull it together when he needed to and make the most of his day too- we even found more Minecraft books.

Our meditation was a great start to a great day, and the perfect day for a Thursday. And tomorrow is not just Friday, but the last Friday of the 2016 school year. I am sure it will be a little long and a little crazy, but it is the start of the last week before the holidays, and only 5 more get-ups to go. Shabbat Shalom and Happy Friday!

Quiet Wednesday Morning

I went to sleep with a headache, and despite all my efforts to ward it off with medication and extra sleep, it was still there when I woke up.  I made the decision to go to school for the morning, put the day in motion and prepare for tomorrow, and see how I felt for the afternoon.

As soon as I got there and faced the glare of the florescent lights, together with Student B greeting me by shouting in my face, I knew I wasn't going to make it through the day, but the first two periods in the library would be okay, before they went to TAA and I prepared for the afternoon. Some with outstanding work and writing to catch up on, and everyone with a new reflection on some of the learning we have been doing,  I knew there was lots for them to work on, in the morning and then later in the afternoon.

Everyone was present this morning, but as we went off to the library, Student A chose to go to his extra gym class, which made us both happy, and also made for a nice quiet start. With only my class in the library, and not everyone needing a computer, they spread out throughout the space. no one sitting too close to anyone else, and Student B sitting in the corner beanbag chair. Before we even began the library was quiet, and as they settled around the space, I wished we could spread out like this more often and was extra happy for it today.

I didn't have to give any reminders, or manage any behaviour, as they were respectful of the space and me, once they knew how I was feeling- one of the funny benefits of letting them know I have a headache. I dimmed the lights and set the music. I went through the usual prompts, the breath count and focused breath pretty quickly, not rushing but not talking too much. I reminded them that they know what to do and how to breathe to find what they need. Then we moved into the silence and I sat down and joined them.

As we were doing all of this, the only other people in the library were two grade 8 girls who were working on a body systems project, in which they replicate the entire human body. As I sat down, I noticed they had opened a picture of the lungs, and I whispered to keep it open and work in a different tab, which they did. When the meditation ended, I brought their project and the picture of the lungs to the attention of the class, showing them how big our lungs really are, stretching from the top of the shoulders to the bottom of the rib cage, illustrating how long it takes to take full, deep inhales and exhales. It was one of those perfectly timed teachable moments, and then it was done, everyone got to work, and I was grateful for the continued peace.

My switch class came about 30 minutes later and I was again grateful the continued peace. The students also seemed pretty happy to be in the library, and immediately spread out onto the beanbag chairs and other parts of the library, and got ready to meditate. A couple of kids even chose to sit on the floor. For the second time that morning I didn't have to give many reminders or manage any behaviour. Everyone got comfortable, and though some were sprawled on their chairs, everyone was still and silent.

I turned off the lights and started the music, again moving quickly through the prompts, count and focused breath, encouraging them to inhale the strength and confidence to work and write, and exhale the fear and worry that blocks them, before enjoying the silence, which they did.

I would have too, had my head not been pounding and the pain not moved into my eye. I was still very grateful for the silence, and instead of sitting up, I put my head in my hands and massaged my eyes. At one point I lifted my head and noted the people passing by the window, and imagined I must have looked very strange, but didn't really care because I was in a lot of pain.

As the track ended, I was grateful for the moments of silence, my classes, and the fact that I was going home to bed shortly after that. Again I was grateful that the next 30 minutes went by quickly and quietly, kids got work done, and that I have a job that allows me to take care of myself instead of suffering through the pain. When my students went to TAA, I booked my sub, did what I had to do, and was home before lunch.

I hope the afternoon at school was as peaceful as the morning for Mr. Y and my students, but whatever it was I am glad I slept through it, and when I woke up my headache was finally gone, as we have a big day tomorrow.

After tomorrow we will also be done to a one-hand count....6 more get-ups to go and already Thursday. Hope you have a happy day!

Full Moon or Something Tuesday

I feel better when I read other teacher's posts, and see it is not just me who is experiencing the challenges of the upcoming holidays, the phases of the moon, and all the other influences on the lives of kids as they navigate middle school, that makes some of them, and the days, just crazy. Today was another one of those days that I am now grateful is done. I am also grateful that this is really as bad as it gets, or at least I hope so.

Student A came in a little calmer and seemed a little more settled in the morning, and went of to Mr. Y's room for Math with the rest of my class, while my switch class came to me first thing in the morning. Just about everyone was back in class, and Student A arrived just a few minutes late, and just as we were about to meditate. The lights were already down when he quietly came in and took his spot with the group.

I moved through the prompts, connecting with Treaty 1 Territory land and giving thanks for the warmth indoors with the frigid temperatures outdoors, the breath count, and then the focused breathing. I encouraged them to bring all of their attention and energy to each inhale and each exhale, and as they inhaled to breathe in their strength and positivity, and as they exhaled to let go of their fear and negativity, to make room for the next inhale, building more strength and positivity.

We moved into the silence and I sat down in the empty chair beside Student 2 and looked across at Student 1. He was pretty quiet as he came in visibly tired, and put his head down as soon as we started. Noticing that he was quiet, and that Student 2 was also sitting quietly beside me breathing, I closed my eyes and joined in the silence.

As I breathed, I listened to the sounds in the room, the shuffling of feet or a chair, people shifting in their seats, not real noise, but not silence. I also noticed just about everyone remained relaxed and undisturbed, enjoying the peace, at least for a few breaths. It was broken when the boy beside Student 1started drumming his fingers on the table.

I heard the noise, opened my eyes, and watched him moving his fingers back and forth against the edge of the table, with both hands. Student 1, who was also bothered by the noise, looked up and also watched the boy beside him for a moment, and then he watched me, watching the boy. When we made eye contact I smiled at Student 1 and kept watching, not quite sure if the student was even aware he was making noise. Student 1 nudged the boy beside him until the boy finally looked at me, saw me looking at him, sort of smiled back at me, and stopped drumming his fingers. Then the room was quiet for the last few breaths.

As the track ended, I encouraged students to come back slowly, taking a couple of breaths before they moved too much or opened their eyes. Then, before I got up to turn on the lights or start the class, I spoke to them from the desk where I was sitting in the circle. I reminded them how we are all working together, and that the idea is to be more mindful, to be aware of the moments, the room and each other before they moved, illustrating the shuffling of the chair, pulling of a paper, or drumming fingers and the noise it makes.

I spoke quietly and gently, making a point of showing them I wasn't angry or upset, and that I wondered if many times they even noticed they were moving or making noise. I told them that if I was the meditator their noises wouldn't even bother me, as they don't many students in the class, but because I am the teacher, I am here to notice these things, and that these are the things we are here to learn, and why meditation is also considered a practice, with some days better than others.

Some days the practice is in patience, which is a large part of meditating, teaching and life in and out of middle school, especially just before the holidays, and especially with Student A. I spent a large part of my day working to support his needs, get him to the spaces where he could self-regulate, and managing his behaviour, because he was bothering so many kids so much, a couple of students were at the point where they might hit him in the face.

It was Day 3 today, and so I didn't see my class as a whole until the final period of the day, which by then had been a long day, especially for Student A, who had finally become engaged in his game design in the class before. As my students came back from Band and got settled, I had been trying to coerce Student A to sit down and join us to meditate.

After he had refused to leave Mr. Y's room, where he had been involved in the game design, Mr. Y jokingly rolled Student A back to my room in his chair. We tried to cajole him from that chair to his seat, but Student A wouldn't have it. He continued to circle around the room, and once everyone else was ready to go, and my patience was running thin, I told him I wanted him to sit down and join us, but he chose to leave the room instead. He knows what to do to take care of himself so I was not concerned, I was also just as happy for the quiet and I started the meditation.

As it was the last period of the day, I chose a short track, and about a minute in Student A came back. Before he entered, he made a lot of noise throwing himself against the window, and then opening to door, stating loudly, "Time to meditate." Student B, and his friends across the room stifled their giggles and managed to keep it together for the moment.

As soon as Student A came in I stood behind him, encouraging him to relax and let go, as I went on with the meditation, but he was fixated on the boy beside him. At one point, he seemed calmer and so I began to walk away, but had to come back pretty quickly when Student A started putting pencil shavings on the head of the boy beside him. Student B and his friends were doing everything they could to keep it together, especially after a couple of looks and a reminder to Student B that he is better than the attention he seeks, but it was only a matter of time.

At one point Student A relaxed again, allowing me to move away for a few minutes, yet never having a moment to sit down. Within a breath or two, he had started again, and this time I took a seat between Student A and the boy he was bothering. The whole thing was too much for Student B and especially his friend, the boy who always gets hurt, across the room. They thought the whole thing was hilarious. I gave them a couple of looks, but in the end smiled with them as they quietly giggled.

As the track ended, today's five and a half minutes seemed incredibly long, I encouraged them to stay with their breath and not move too quickly. Then we all took a deep inhale and an audible exhale, letting go of all our frustration. I had them repeat that, and then I had everyone take a deep inhale and on the exhale, start laughing. I encouraged them to laugh and make noise and let it all out, because on a cold and crazy afternoon like today, what else were we going to do?

It was amazing that almost all of them used the last 20 minutes of the day to work on the French interviews they are preparing, especially once Student A got involved with his Minecraft, and we ended on a pretty positive note.

It wasn't much of a meditation, but at least the day ended peacefully enough, and whatever tomorrow brings, now there are only 7 more get-ups to go.

Crazy Monday

There is no doubt that the holidays are coming, and no doubt that today was Monday, and by the end of the day, the kids, especially Student A, were losing it a little. It was one of those crazy days. Day 2s, when we begin with Band/Exploratory and Choir, and have TAA in the afternoon, makes for a more relaxed teaching day, but it sometimes harder on the kids, especially when they need to focus and work, and so requires more behaviour management. There are less opportunities for meditation on Day 2s. the day we need it the most. So I tried to make the most of the time we had, and I take solace reminding myself that there are days like this, and they too pass. And if this is the worst of them, I am pretty lucky.

I saw my switch class after break in the morning and there were quite a few students absent, but Student 1 was back and his presence noted immediately. As he sat down, he picked up a few large blobs of Plasticine, with which he promptly began playing. I reminded him that fidget toys shouldn't require his focus, or make any noise, and encouraged him to relax along with everyone else.

As I turned out the lights and started the music, Student 2 got up to leave the room, supposedly to go to the bathroom. He does that occasionally, and as he comes and goes he is relatively mindful, yet it can be somewhat annoying, and a conversation we will eventually have, but for today, I let it, and him, go, as I began the usual prompts, breath count and guided breath, with a focus on a positive start to the week.

Student 1 was unsettled from the beginning, fidgeting with the Plasticine, which jiggled the table calling the attention of the person beside him, who responded by spreading his elbows out into the middle of the table. As they attempted to call each other's attention I stood between them both, encouraging them to focus inward and relax by bringing their attention to their breath, and letting everything else go.

As we moved into the silence, I sat down in the empty seat beside Student 1, and though he never stopped fidgeting and rolling the Plasticine, he didn't bother the student beside him anymore, nor was he bothered by him. He looked over at me every once in awhile, I think to make sure I was still there, and then kept playing, but he was quiet. So was everyone else.

I was happy Student 1 seemed calmer, and really impressed by the power everyone else had displayed in their focus- no one else was bothered by Student 1, or the coming and going of Student 2, or anything else. Head up or down, everyone else was quiet and pretty still, enjoying the time to breathe. It was a good start for a Monday, not the best meditation, not the most peaceful, but good enough for a Monday.

The morning should have been an indicator of what was to come in the afternoon, but if it wasn't, once everyone got together and seated, if not entirely settled, in the library after break, it was clear it we weren't going to reach the depths of peace and silence, and if we achieved mostly quiet it was going to be good enough.

My class got to the library first and as we hadn't had the chance to meditate, though I was planning to anyway, when one noticed and asked if we would, I turned the question back to them and asked if they wanted to meditate. There was a resounding yes, which was clearly louder than the few audible groans I also heard. A minute later, Mr. Y's class joined us, and though they had already meditated, I told them they would be joining my class who hadn't yet had the chance. They spread around the room, filling the empty spaces, some at tables, some in front of computers, and others on the beanbag chairs, including the one Student A often uses, even though I had urged him to take it while he was waiting for his computer to load.

I was grateful he didn't bother the boy who had taken his spot, and just sat down in front of the computer, but still wished he had the spot later, when he was drumming his fingers on the keyboard and mouse, trying to disturb my Breather, sitting beside him and me, asking him to stop. At one point the noise was wearing on me so much that I momentarily considered asking the boy in the beanbag chair to move for him, just so he could be quiet. But I couldn't disturb the boy who had just sat there, nor could I reward Student A's poor choices. 

Thankfully, by the time I had to give all my attention to Student A, Student B and his buddy,  who were once again sitting together, had quieted. As we began the meditation, they were having a staring contest and trying to make each other laugh, so I stood between them and placed a binder to block their view. I am pretty grateful they lost interest in bothering each other, because Student A had a tough day and a hard time settling.

I made my way over to him and his agitation and the noise it was producing was the worst I have seen, and he did not respond to my initial requests as he has in the past. I stopped the breath count and other guidance, reminding my students that they knew what to do, so that I could direct my attention to Student A in quiet conversation. I again encouraged him to tell me what he needed, and then when he couldn't, I encouraged him to relax. I tried to soothe him, telling him to give himself the chance, encouraging him to put his head down and breathe. Eventually he did, and was quiet for the last 2 or 3 minutes, but not as calm as he has been in the past. But, again for a Monday afternoon before the holidays, I'll take it.

Once he quieted I was able to devote my attention to the group, encouraging them to stay with their breath and the silence. Most appeared undisturbed by any of the more restless students, including my Breather, who was sitting right beside Student A. For the second time today I noticed that the majority are finding their power in their ability to focus inward and enjoy the quiet time and a few minutes to breath regardless of what is going on around them,

Though again it was not perfect, the 5 and a half minutes still went by quickly, as they usually do, and though I didn't leave Student A's vicinity, or even close my eyes, I was glad he did and had enjoyed a few quiet minutes. It didn't last for long and once the meditation was done, he had a hard time focusing and didn't even want to work on Minecraft. This was the biggest indicator that something was up, and as tough and annoying as his behaviour may have been for me to deal with, whatever is going on, I know that it is way more difficult for him. I just hope tomorrow is a better day for him, and everyone. 

Eight more get-ups to go!

Finally Friday

It was finally Friday, the Friday after the storm. It was a very long week, which simultaneously flew by, and everyone was happy it was Friday. Student A arrived a few minutes late and was clearly unsettled, immediately circling the room, grabbing people's papers and posters, and when he finally sat down, poking his pencil through the papers I had provided for drawing.

Part of me wonders if his anxiousness had something to do with my absence the afternoon before, and part of me imagines that whatever happens in his life and head has little, or nothing, to do with me. I also know that on one hand it doesn't matter, and on the other hand I speculate, because I really wish I knew, and it would be so much easier if Student A could tell me himself. I consistently try to remind him that he can tell me what he needs, but I am not really certain that he is able. I feel that if he could then he would, and many of his challenges in school are based on the fact that he cannot voice his needs.

After announcements and before starting our day, I managed to take a minute to sit down with him and set our schedule for the day. This has proven helpful, as when he knows what the day has in store, and that he will have time for Minecraft and some days, extra gym, then it makes the day easier for him and me, even if he doesn't always stick to the schedule.

On Friday morning our talk helped him to settle a little, but he kept poking the pencil through his paper, and making noise each time he did. until we were ready to start the meditation and I reminded him the only thing he couldn't do was bother someone else. I told him I wanted him in the room, but if he kept making noise he would have to leave, and that he could choose to focus on his drawing instead. I left him to make his choice and thankfully, after a few final stabs at the paper, he turned his attention to drawing and was quiet while he did.

The next six and a half minutes went by quickly and the room was still and silent. Though both Mr. Y and I had told them that we didn't want them up until midnight the night before finishing their projects, and could take the weekend if they needed, many of them had still been up late and were tired. They were glad when I noted that we had made it to Friday, but were even happier to have the moments to rest. Student B was also quiet, because he was preoccupied with all the time he had wasted and all the work he still had to do, especially when he learned, though it had been said many times before, that we were doing other things and there were no work periods that day. It didn't matter to me that he was quiet because he was sulky and sad- it is all part of our learning in grade 7.

I went through the usual prompts and breath count, and brought attention to our learning in grade 7 during the focused breath. I encouraged them to notice how they felt and find what they needed in each breath, as they reflected on their projects, learning, how they had used their time, their efforts, and their accomplishments, or lack thereof. I emphasized being honest, without using it as excuse to put themselves down, but rather to take the opportunity to examine their habits, to see what they need to keep doing and what they need to change. Then I reminded them to inhale what they needed, like the strength to keep going, while exhaling the fear that blocks them from being their best.

We moved into the silence and the room stayed still. I looked over at Student A and at some point he had put his drawing away and his head down. He appeared calm and comfortable, as did everyone else. I found a seat and joined in the silence and gratitude for Friday and the weekend to come. The meditation ended peacefully and then we moved into the classes of the morning, in which I read them The Holocaust story, The Mozart Question, and they drew as they listened. We didn't quite finish in the first 2 periods, and so I took our French period in the afternoon, and the drawings and impressions were really remarkable. This week, we will have to do some sharing.

My switch class came to my room after gym, during period 4 and with only one period together, I chose a short 5 and a half minute track. They were chatty and energized after gym, and took a few minutes to get settled as we began the class, but calmed once we began the meditation. Though still not as still as my room, the class was quiet, and I once again noted the absence of Student 1, my fidgeter. Without him, there are only as couple of others who are prone to fidget, the boy who sits beside Student 2 and another girl. who is pretty self-involved, and has trouble settling if she has other things on her mind.

Today everyone, including both of them, were pretty still and silent as we moved through the prompts, breath count, and the same focused breathing I had encouraged with my class earlier, though the boy required a reminder before putting his book away. I joined in the silence and was distracted once, by the boy, who I thought would disturb Student 2, who tries to breathe but has a quick temper, but he didn't, and I closed my eyes again to take a few more breaths.

Just before the silence ended, the girl, completely involved in whatever she urgently had to do in the moment, ripped a paper out of her binder, making a loud noise, which was amplified by the silence of the room. As they are gaining the power of meditation, no one in the class was disturbed, but as I am the teacher, I was, and I was annoyed. I opened my eyes, and because she knew she was doing something she was not supposed to be, she looked up at me as I did. In an attempt to speak her language, and not give her the satisfaction of destroying the peace or getting attention, I looked at her and rolled my eyes, conveying my disdain for her selfish actions and lack of awareness and respect for others. She got the message, mostly because she knows she is not supposed to disturb others.

A breath or two later the track ended, and after we were done, but before we started the class, I reminded them that though we are individuals, we live in the world, and the classroom, together, and our choices and actions impact each other, even if it is just shifting a chair or pulling out a paper, and that awareness of each other is what we are growing towards. Then we got on with our learning and another class, and morning, were done before I knew it.

As was the afternoon, the day, and now this weekend. I hope you enjoyed yours as well. Wishing everyone a safe, productive and happy week. And to teachers like me, 9 get-ups to go.